Well, I've given it some thought, and I think I have come up with my goals for this year. Like I said earlier, I feel completely overwhelmed with my family, my ministry, my commitments and my life in general....I don't feel like this year I can "add" things to it....things I would like to accomplish.....such as, learn how to play the guitar, read lots of books, pursue my photography, get my master's degree, lose lots of weight, etc. Those are things I would love to put time and effort into, but I don't feel this is the time for me.....and that is hard, because I LOVE the new year, making lists and setting new goals. But the Lord just doesn't have me in a place where I can do that right now. And I've learned to be ok with it....mostly.
But what I have decided to do is work on some things that I am already doing.....improving what I am already busy with. I dont' feel like that will take as much time from my busy schedule and yet I can still be working towards 'something'. We'll see how that works.....

For starters, I am not going to be able to spend as much time on my weight, but I do want to continue to improve my eating habits and live a healthy life. I get so discouraged if I don't meet my 'goals' in this area, that I am not setting specific ones, but just seeking to please the Lord with my choices. And to regulate my pain that so often hinders me. I find that the more I exercise, the better I feel. And although I don't always have the time to spend in that area, I need to make it a little more of a priority....I need to feel better so I can make this year more productive and effective.

Next, I want to improve my prayer life.....I want to be sincere when I say "I will pray for you". I used to be so faithful in keeping a prayer journal, but now I only do it when I go to prayer meetings or hear the requests at church...but I want to be faithful in the little things too, outside of the formal settings. And I want to pray for my kids more too....not just the day to day stuff, but for their future. Sometimes it overwhelms me to think too far ahead, but I need to do it more often and more diligently.

And along the same lines, I want to be more committed to doing my quiet times....so I have made one specific goal there....I will not miss a day in 2010. I struggled whether to make that goal or not...just not sure if I could accomplish it....but after much prayer and some insight from a friend, decided to do it, commit to it whole-heartedly. I am looking forward to it already.

Next, there are several relationships I need to work on this year. It seems like my whole life and ministry center around relationships....and it's not a big secret that I am not very good at them (why the Lord put me in full-time ministry still amazes me sometimes). But since I am already chin deep in them, I might as well make them as profitable (for everyone involved) as possible. There are a few relationships in my family that need attention, as well as those I minister to often. Then there are the friends that I so often overlook. So this year I am just seeking to improve what I already have and as far as the new ones that emerge this year, I want to start them off right, with less hesitation. That one make take more than a year to accomplish, but I might as well start now.

And speaking of my ministry, that needs a little polishing up as well. I do tend to get overwhelmed in at times....if not for the sheer size of it, but the heaviness of it. There is much pain and struggle where I work....every family that I am involved with has some kind of struggle in it....and not what is normal to many of us.....it's deep, harsh, dangerous, and heavy. There is the threat of homelessness and starvation with some....there is much, much abuse out here.....infidelity is huge, along with alcoholism and drugs......there is the native religion that pulls at them and along with that the huge walls that we have to break through to reach them with the Gospel. Hopefully, with the improvement in my prayer life and time with the Lord, this area will improve as well. I need to daily remember that He will not give me more than I can handle...and with every trial He will give me the strength that I need and the wisdom I need to give to others.

So there it is...my list for the year....it's not near as fun or dynamic as years past, but it is where I am these days....and I am confident that this is where the Lord has me and that these are the goals He has set before me for the upcoming year.
I am praying (already working on goal number 2!) that the Lord will honor my efforts and my desires to make these improvements. We shall see.........